Well, folks, here we go again. Kamala Harris, the woman who was this close to becoming the President of the United States, just gave us another rambling, nonsensical monologue—this time about Doritos. Yes, you read that right. At an artificial intelligence conference, where one might expect some level of intellectual discussion, Harris decided that her love of nacho cheese chips was the most pressing issue at hand.
In a video that quickly made the rounds on social media, Harris explained that she skipped the Oscars, but faced a serious dilemma—she wanted Doritos. So, naturally, she did what any high-powered government official would do: she fired up DoorDash and ordered herself a big bag. “I was willing to give up whatever might be the tracking of Kamala Harris’ particular fondness for nacho cheese Doritos for the sake of getting a big bag of Doritos as I watched the Oscars,” she said.
Now, I know what you’re thinking: What does this have to do with artificial intelligence? Great question. Apparently, the CEO of Feedzai, Nuno Sebastiao, was wondering the same thing because he tried to help her out by suggesting that she was making a larger point about “consumer behavior.” That was his mistake. Instead of taking the lifeline, Harris doubled down and delivered one of the most incoherent word salads we’ve seen from her yet.
She started by floating the idea that consumers have a right to expect innovation to solve their everyday problems—like her snack cravings, I guess? Then, in the same breath, she tried to pivot to scientific breakthroughs in medicine before abruptly switching to affordable housing. Because obviously, the logical progression from Doritos is… real estate policy.
“I would love it if there would be an investment of resources in solving the affordable housing issue in America,” she said, before literally pleading: “Like, help me with that. Help me with that.”
By this point, social media had already exploded with people wondering if she had been hitting the wine before the event. Daily Wire host Matt Walsh joked, “Imagine if we had to endure four years of Doritos anecdotes.” Another user quipped, “Kamala is drunk again.” And perhaps the most fitting response of all: “We dodged a missile, not a bullet.”
Let’s just take a moment to appreciate the fact that this woman was almost President. She was one heartbeat away from the Oval Office under Joe Biden, and if 2024 had gone differently, we could have been sitting through four years of policy discussions that somehow always found their way back to DoorDash and snack cravings.
The best part? The entire thing was so obviously staged. Someone pointed out that Harris conveniently had a pre-packaged photo-op of her eating Doritos, which just so happened to drop right around the same time. This is what the Democrats think counts as relatable. Meanwhile, the rest of us are out here trying to pay for groceries and gas—both of which, by the way, Trump is already fixing.
This isn’t just a funny viral moment. It’s a reminder of how unserious the modern Democratic Party has become. While Trump is out there actually solving problems, Harris is busy delivering AI conference keynote speeches about her snack habits. It’s embarrassing, and thankfully, America made the right choice.
