Report States Cable News Network Facing Serious Layoffs Following Company Spinoff

By
Rachel Stevenson
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Well, well, well — looks like CNN’s long, slow tumble from “most trusted name in news” to “most ignored name in airport lounges” is finally catching up with reality.

Warner Bros. Discovery just confirmed they’re splitting their empire into two neat little packages: one with all the juicy moneymakers — think DC Studios, HBO, Max, actual movies and scripted shows people want to watch — and the other? A junk drawer of aging cable networks that includes your grandma’s favorite HGTV reruns, the half-forgotten Food Network… and of course, CNN, the once-mighty cable news titan now limping toward the nearest cliff.

Let’s call it what it is. The spin-off holding CNN is shaping up to be the corporate equivalent of that junk car you keep in the garage just in case — battered, high-maintenance, and hemorrhaging value faster than Joe Biden forgets where he parked the economy. CNN’s been circling the drain for years now, but as Dylan Byers so generously detailed, it’s officially in the ICU.

With ratings tanked, foreign bureaus bleeding money, and audiences preferring the freewheeling chaos of TikTok to CNN’s carefully scripted sanctimony, there’s not much left of the “grandiose vision” they once had for themselves. You can only cosplay as the nation’s conscience for so long before people notice the emperor’s got no viewers.

And oh, the irony. For a network that’s spent the last decade lecturing Americans from its gilded Manhattan perch, turns out the gravy train’s coming to a screeching halt. Byers doesn’t mince words: CNN is “doomed” and hemorrhaging cash on bloated salaries that now look more like punchlines.

Anderson Cooper’s pulling $18 million a year — for what, exactly? To quietly nod through a panel discussion that could be replaced by a YouTube algorithm and a stock photo of a concerned face? Kaitlan Collins brings in similar numbers for a fraction of the cost, which begs the question: why bother with the elder statesmen at all?

And Jake Tapper — locked into some low-eight-figure multiyear deal — is reportedly the last of the overpaid stars who’ll ever see that kind of payout. The bean counters have finally arrived, and the talent bubble is bursting. So now the network’s future involves “shittier offices,” “fewer perks,” and the dreaded corporate purgatory of “more scrutiny of travel and expenses.” In other words, welcome to the real world, CNN. Maybe try reporting on it sometime.

Byers drives the final nail in the coffin with brutal clarity: the future isn’t some reinvention of CNN as a sleek digital subscription model (because let’s be honest — who’s going to pay for more Don Lemon?), but a slow, inevitable fade into irrelevance. Think HLN, CNN’s forgotten sibling, which quietly vanished while nobody was watching. That’s where CNN’s headed, and even their top brass — sipping pinot at D.C. donor dinners and still acting like they’re running the fourth branch of government — can’t see it coming.

Meanwhile, Fox News, the network CNN loves to hate, is trouncing them across the board. Not just on slow news nights, but especially when real stories break. Turns out Americans prefer commentary from people who don’t look like they’re lecturing a freshman seminar at Brown. While CNN’s anchors clutch pearls over tone and trauma, Fox is out here grabbing audiences by the millions — for a lot less money and a whole lot more common sense.

So yes, as the liberal media machine clutches its pearls and braces for layoffs, one thing’s clear: market forces are finally catching up with the virtue-signaling bubble CNN built around itself. And in this economy, ideological smugness doesn’t pay the bills.

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